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The number one problem I have experienced with couples in conflict isn’t sex, money or power. It’s communication. The number one complaint about communication is that “when I speak to you, you’re not listening.” What are the ideal conditions under which one can deeply listen to and really hear his/her spouse, partner, child, friend, boss,… Continue reading IDEAL CONDITIONS FOR LISTENING TO ANOTHER PERSON

Clients with serious depression tend to ruminate over how bad they feel most of the time. Many of them imagine that non-depressed people are lucky because they go about their lives feeling good or at least OK. The truth is everyone feels disappointed, discouraged or defeated at times, and that it’s both normal and appropriate… Continue reading THE IMPORTANCE OF BALANCING MOODS

A child who grows up consistently perceiving rejection by his parents and/or schoolmates is likely to feel increasingly excluded, isolated, depressed, and hopeless about connecting with others. Eventually, such a child may conclude there is something wrong with or defective about him that means rejection is his fate. Although coping mechanisms exist (whether it’s spending… Continue reading EXPECTING REJECTION GUARANTEES IT – WHAT CAN YOU DO?

Let’s start by distinguishing compassion from empathy in the context of a helping professional relationship. Compassion is a state of having care and concern for another, listening with presence and receptivity to their story of suffering, understanding and validating their suffering, and using words/gestures of comfort to convey a wish or hope that they begin… Continue reading THE VALUE OF MODULATING EMPATHY FOR THERAPISTS AND COACHES

Living day to day with major depression is like being in a dark room with the windows shut and the shades drawn. There is no light. Eventually you experience feelings of helplessness and hopelessness and can no longer imagine changing the situation. This loss of control comes with forgetting that you were the one who… Continue reading HOW TO LET LIGHT INTO YOUR DEPRESSION

Most of my adult clients who were emotionally neglected or abused in childhood tell me “I’m emotionally numb,” “I can’t feel my feelings,” “I have no words for my feelings,” “I am afraid of my feelings” or “I don’t know how to express my feelings.,” To me this is sad but not all surprising. Animals… Continue reading THE NECESSITY OF EMOTIONAL LEARNING AND SKILL BUILDING IN HUMANS

We, as humans, just want to love and be loved. We do this by trying to connect in the ways we know how, which could be through people-pleasing, compliments, gifts, kindnesses, appreciations, acts of service, etc. But no matter how hard we try, no matter how thoughtful our efforts, sometimes we get no feeling of… Continue reading ACCEPTING THE BITTERSWEET QUALITY OF HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS

Ставки на спорт в Вавада надежный способ заработка Ставки на спорт в Вавада стабильный источник дохода Открывайте свой счет прямо сейчас, чтобы воспользоваться выгодными коэффициентами и бонусами. Начните с изучения правил и условий платформы – это повысит ваши шансы на успех и минимизирует риски. Анализируйте прошлые результаты. Перед тем как сделать выбор, углубитесь в статистику… Continue reading Ставки на спорт в Вавада стабильный источник дохода

You don’t need to suffer from social anxiety to feel intimidated and out-of-place at social gatherings of colleagues. I have more than a few clients who dread networking events because they perceive others to be so much more established, knowledgeable, and self-assured. In their own minds they don’t match up and feel badly outclassed. This… Continue reading We’re All Just People

When people fall in love they typically share a vision of how much joy they will have living as an exclusive couple and how each will support the other in building his/her dreams of career and family. As the years go by it is common to see couples drift apart and lose the freshness and… Continue reading Discerning and Reversing Suffocating Inertia in Relationships